Conversation

octombrie 23, 2009 at 7:16 pm (Creaţie, Social) (, , , , )

A: Hey! What’s up?

A: what else bugs you these days?what have you been up to?

B: the only school-free activity was the movie I went to on Thursday. everything pisses me off. I can’t stand these routs anymore… college, home, sleep, college ….

B: if I sleep

B: best case scenario.

A: I want to make you feel better but … but I fell the same way

A: tomorrow I won’t be a pleasant company

A: I’m warning you

B: neighter of us is a bad company when we meet. that’s what I enjoy most. when I see you guys I forget everything for a few hours …

B: I think I have reached the peak of confusion and uncertainty in life.

A: I wonder what happened to us. We are both like this for no reason?

A: for how long have you been like this?

A: my mood started yesterday evening

B: mine since we returned from the mountain.

A: Ahh …

A: Until now I was in a very good mood … and then boom

A: so sudden

B: it’s just life. it throws us an invisible kick in the ass from time to time. but I hurts, even if it is invisible

B: your connection failed?

A: Yup

A: sorry

B: don’t worry. but if you have said something after the “kick of life” I didn’t get it.

A: I said to hell with life

A: because I do not understand it

A: that’s it

B: You know what I think?

A: What?

B: we want too much from it. We imagine a world far too complex, we have too high expectations and therefore we get this feeling that we don’t understand life. in fact, we are the ones hard to understand.

A: I know

A: This pisses me off

A: it makes no sense

A: we are too complex for this

A: you are born to die

A: or wait

A: you struggle …

B: maybe we should not give so much of ourselves

B: we shouldn’t give a crap, pardon the expression

A: you have no idea how much I envy those who do not care

A: why can’t my brain work differently?

A: not thinking about the purpose

A: the life

B: only thinking about today.

B: sounds good, right?

A: Yes it does

A: Life sucks

B: yes it does. but you can’t get too be so soft, careless.

B: that tortures your soul, your brain.

B: and you try to give the best of yourself

A: but I can’t

A: I’ve tried

A: but I can’t do the “best of yourself” part. It never feels enough

A: I feel small

A: unimportant

A: stupid

A: and the list continues

B: but be aware that others are not more superior that that. I realised that. never mind the social stratification and all that crap about class, wealth and intelligence.In fact, we are all the same.

B: but it still does not make me feel better.

B: everything is a big bullshit

A: That’s what I wanted to say

B: and my head is a big chaos

A: I know …

A: so is mine

A: In times like this I envy those who believe in God

A: They know what is their meaning in this world

B: False. even the most faithful are lost. because at some point, everyone, no matter how Christian would be, puts in doubt the existence of the divine. life does that to you.

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Friendship

septembrie 24, 2009 at 9:34 am (Creaţie, Personal) (, , , , , , )

Do you know who your best friend is? A simple question. But before you decide it’s a silly question and you want to say “of course I know who my best friend is!” I want you to define the concept. What is a best friend? Lets pretend for a second that being a best friend was a job and you really needed to hire someone. What would his/her resume look like? Who would be good at this job? What qualities should that person have? Maybe he/she must be a good listener. Or maybe someone who knows how to have fun. What do you do with your best friend? Go shopping? Talk for hours and hours about anything? Watch movies? Why is your best friend your BEST friend? What is the quality that gives him/her that superlative?

A different view of this discussion is the one that includes both individuals in a friendship. You can’t have a best friend unless you are one. Your friend can be a good listener, but do you listen back? He/she comes to your help whenever you need it, but do you do the same? You can call him/her in the middle of the night because you got dumped, but if you’re the one being called, how do you react? Now that you’ve answered all these questions, I believe the first one needs a bit of editing. Do you have a best friend?

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Reality vs. fiction

august 26, 2009 at 7:42 pm (Creaţie, Personal) (, , , , )

Movies are like a heartless man who allures a five year old with chocolate and candies and after that he gives him nothing but an evil smile. Movies are pure fantasies, despite the „warning” that they are based on reality. In other words, movies are bits and pieces gathered from reality and distorted in such manner that every scent of truth fades drastically into the background. A slight increase in those „sad endings” movies is being noticed. However, the happy ending stories stand in front of the croud of genres, and they keep invading the minds of people in every age group. No matter how down-to-earth you are, you can’t help to imagine yourself as part of the story, to identify with the characters and to say „-Ah, maybe that could happen to me too!” . Maybe someday we’ll find our prince. Or maybe we will get the girl in the end. Or perhaps we’ll get noticed by some great talent seeker and we’ll become famous. It all sound wonderful, magical. The world of a movie is a land of perfection. And then reality hits. To some, this isn’t a sudden shift. For others it comes with a shock, the shock of being just human, with an insignificant amount of luck, with an average life and a confused mind. What to do next? Carry on? Keep dreaming? Get angry? Or maybe watch another movie and start over?

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Illusions

iunie 27, 2009 at 9:18 pm (Creaţie, Personal) (, , , , )

Parts of our lives are pure illusions. Seconds lost, which seemed unreal, minutes of mind blackout from which we awake confussed but forget they happened. But what about the hours, days or maybe longer periods of time that are too good or too bad to seem real? What are those? Have you ever felt so happy, so fullfilled that you stopped for a moment to think, to make shure it is real? Personally, I don’t know the feeling. But I’ve heard others talking about these moments and in most of the cases they say the same thing: everything was like a illusion. I ask you now about the moments that situate themselves at the opposite pole. The moments when the situation gets so bad and so impossible to resolve that you find yourseves unsure of everything. Maybe a day that started out like every other day, or a routine situation that should have had a routine ending. And at some point something clicked. A wrong move, a poor choice of words, a missinterpretation of a gesture, a small accident. And everything switched to disaster. In these type of moments you can’t even focuse on what happened. Your mind has a hard time trying to adjust to the situation, to explain things that look out of place and out of context.

BulltetSpeed

It’s late and you want to get home because your tired. You increase the speed a little. What harm can it do? Or maybe you get off early from work and buy your whife a big bouquet of white roses and want to surprise her. But what if you forgot to buy something and you walk into the store, and  before you take knowledge of what is around you, a gunshot noise pierces your ears. A guy is standing in front of you, with a 45 pointed at your stomach. What would you call this moment?

To be continued.

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